IS IT I?

"One of you," Jesus said, "one of you will betray me. One of you, my best and closest friends, will betray me before this night is over." And with that statement the internal and external questioning began. To a man it was one and the same: "Is it I, Lord? Am I the one who is going to betray you?"

The Gospel writers don't tell if or how many of the Twelve quietly pulled Jesus away from the rest, whispered in his ear, and asked, "Is it I?" The writers wrote after the fact. They knew by then whom Jesus was talking about: Judas. It wasn't necessary for them to have each man ask the question, only the one who already knew the answer.

But aside from Judas, each one of them must have wondered if he was to be the one. Jesus, after all, knew them almost better than they knew themselves, maybe even better. Maybe he knew about some flaw in character that would lead a faithful follower to betray the leader he loved. Maybe. So, I think, each asked the question.

The reality, of course, is that the question was not a one-time question because the statement was not a one-time statement. Jesus could walk into any gathering of his followers to day -- any church, any clergy gathering, any Sunday School Class, any Bible study, any prayer group, and make the same statement: "Before this day is over, one of you is going to betray me." Like Peter and Andrew, like Judas and John, like all the Twelve, each one in each group would begin to ask, "Is it I, Lord? Am I the one you're talking about."

The answer would be one and the same to each and every one in each and every group or gathering: "Yes, you are the one. You all are." And we, like Peter who said he would never deny Jesus, would begin to protest that we would never, ever do such a thing.

But we do, and every day. Every day of our lives we betray Jesus. For every time we deliberately do that which we know we should not do, we betray Jesus. Every time we deliberately fail to do that which we know we should do, we betray Jesus. Every sin of omission and every sin of commission is a betrayal of Jesus by the one who professes his or her faith in Jesus.

Perhaps our only consolation is that our betrayal does not lead to Jesus's death on the cross. But that is not much of a consolation when we begin to realize that our sins of commission and omission hurt other people. Perhaps the pain and suffering we inflict on others is not as great as that which was inflicted on Jesus, but it still hurts. We still cause pain and sorrow to others because of our sins. There is no escape from that reality.

Not a pleasant thought but one we must think about on occasion if only to remind ourselves that every day we are faced with the choice of either living out our faith in Jesus, as difficult as that may be at times, or turning away and betraying Jesus, as easy as that might be at times. "Is it I, Lord?" we ask. "Yes, it is," Jesus replies. But with the grace of God and the support of one another, it does not have to be me/us.