YOU HAVE TO WONDER

Over my 50 years as a priest I have visited with and tried to attend to the very real spiritual issues of parishioners. There were those who were suffering from some kind of malady or another, in real physical pain and wondering what they had dome that God was punishing them so. They looked to me, the man of God, for some answer, any answer, if only so that they could make some sense out of all this physical pain.

They were not the only ones, those in physical pain. There were those who were dealing with tragedies of one kind or another in their lives, usually with family members: the death of a child, the devastating illness of a loved one, you name it. The pain was not physical. It was spiritual, mental. They, too, wondered why God, all-loving, all-powerful, could allow this to happen. They looked to be for some semblance of an answer even if, deep in their hearts, I could not give them one.

If there was any solace on my part when confronted with these questions, it was and is that I was and still am not alone. Those same questions have been asked from the time humanity began to believe in a God who could prevent such suffering from ever happening. Even pagans asked these questions from their gods. I was not alone and have never been alone in struggling to explain, let alone, understand unjust suffering.

St. Theresa of Avila once observed in a personal prayer to God, “Lord, if this is the way you treat your friends, it’s no wonder you have so few.” She may have prayed that tongue-in-cheek but she was right on. Millions of people refuse to believe in a loving God, one who allows those who believe to suffer so much. Life, to them, is akin to a crapshoot: you get what you get. Roll the dice, and if you are lucky, you’ll be spared the pain or a reasonable amount of it. If not, so be it. In this life there are winners and there are losers. Just hope for the best.

But that doesn’t work for those who believe and was never, and never is, an answer for someone who has to try to explain to those who are suffering why they are. The truth is, there is no answer, at least not one that will allow the sufferer to feel less pain. Personally, I don’t know what I have done to deserve to be so blessed, perhaps even spared, while so many are in so much underserved pain. I am only thankful. But that does not stop me from wondering about all this.

So how do I, how do we, answer the question that will never go away, the truly unanswerable question for those of us who believe, because it really is? Saying “I don’t know” does not get me off the hook. Saying “God has God’s reasons” makes one wonder what these reasons are knowing full well God will not give us a direct answer even if that were possible. The only answer I can give is “I don’t know why you are suffering, why what has happened happened. There is no satisfactory answer. All I can promise and all I can do is walk with you as best I can.”