GROWING OLDER

The parish my wife and I attend has a gift shop that raises funds for the parish’s outreach ministries. The Shoppe (their spelling) sells “antiques, eclectics and practicalities” according to the business cars they had out. We volunteer to manage the Shoppe for a few hours the first Saturday of each month. The business so far for us has not been great as knowledge about the Shoppe only comes from word of mouth. But they raise several thousand dollars or more each year.

To be honest, I would not be a customer so much as I would be a donator, giving the Shoppe “practicalities” we no longer want or need. That said, I did come across a mug that caught my eye only because of what was painted on it: “70 is when your body gives your brain a list of things it’s not going to do any more.” Words of wisdom from someone else’s donates practicality.

Those of us who are 70 and beyond know from experience the truth of those words of wisdom. As my Mom used to say, “When I get up in the morning and look at the person in the mirror, I wonder who that old person is.” For whatever reason our brains seem to think we are younger than we really are, and sometimes very much younger. And when we listen to our brains and not our bodies, we pay the price; and it often a very steep and painful one.

Of course, it is often a struggle to ignore what our brains are saying to us because we do not want to admit that, yes, we are growing older; and, yes, we cannot do what we once were able to do. A while back I was putting together a computer desk for my wife and I could not get it together even as I was following the directions. My son-in-law came over, picked up my screwdriver and tightened the screws that I had thought I had tightened. Halleluia! He had what I had lost because of my growing older: the physical strength to do what I used to be able to do.

The truth is, I still try to do everything I can because my brain tells me that I can. But I am learning, even if it has taken me 80 years to get the message. Growing older is a part of life. Learning what we can and what we cannot do as we age is also a part of life. Sometimes the hardest part is simply admitting we cannot do what we once could because we see it as a blow to our pride. I’ve seen all-star athletes hold on for one more year because of their pride when they were actually way past their prime.

Learning is a life-long project. Mostly we learn the hard way: not so much from our successes as from our failures. We learn what we can do and what we cannot.

On the other hand, is it not better to think we are younger that we are? I’ve seen too many old young people and not enough young old people. I think I am still of the mind to listen to my brain and pay the price of my foolishness, the coffee cup’s advice notwithstanding.